I really want to stop going to our playgroup. It's not so much that I don't like the moms. Or the kids. It's that right now it consists of two other mothers who, between them, have SIX children and another on the way. Two sets of twins. It's a lot overwhelming.
I just want OUT. But I hate to cancel on them as a number of other women have already. I also feel badly because I feel like I need to get Shea around some babies or something... because maybe that would help his developmental motivation. Cause right now Shea is opting out of rolling, laying on his stomach and any type of crawl - army or hands and knees.
I am worried as he still seems to fall over a bunch when sitting. It's the head size making it hard for him to find balance. Especially when he starts getting tired. Oh and when he bakes a stinkloaf in his diaper, he hates sitting on it so he throws himself back. So there are still pillows around him when he sits.
I am assuming if he isn't doing better with the tummy time by his 9 month appt we may end up with EI or something coming to investigate. I don't pick him up as soon as he starts complaining on his tummy. I even let him cry a bit. Then when it gets to the crying-face-down-no-recovery I pick him up. Usually by then he's so pissed off he has to be walked and calmed down. So if the EI frickers come in here and say I need to let him be frustrated I may lose my shit on them.
Tummy time usually starts out ok. I'm encouraging, I try to engage him with fun things like new toys, forbidden objects like the remote, silly things like bubbles or Liam's faces. Shea can push up and straighten his elbows. Soon he tires because of his head weight and he goes down. He pushes up like this a few more times and then stops trying. He does move his body left or right about 45 degrees. If I put my hands behind his feet, he will push on them a few times. But after about 10 minutes or 15-20 on a good session - he is done. He whines a little. Sometimes he just puts his head down and to the side and plays with the blanket or chews on a toys he's successfully grabbed. But it's not long before he's hating life and I have to get him up.
I know every child progresses at their own rate. And I know that his body is trying to support his head and gain strength but I just feel like I'm failing him somehow. I do not carry him around all day long. I sit him down and walk in and out of the room as I need to. I want him to know that I have legs that move me around. We all crawl around the floor at his level so he can see. I have tried to teach him how to move his arms to roll easier.
No use.
I'm glad he's healthy and seems to be happy for the most part. I just have this feeling in my stomach that a mother gets when her child seems to have something a bit wrong and she can't just make it right.
Monday, March 3, 2008
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2 comments:
Oh I know just how you feel, except for me it's the food he's not eating. He just started eating those puff things like a week ago and does okay. Everything else he gags and then spits up his entire dinner (baby food). Friends of mine are feeding their 9 month olds real food and Liam can't handle anything except the puffs and that took us a long time to get him used to. I worry that I'm being too much of a chicken and not letting him try new things. I worry that I'm creating a picky eater.
Each baby does develop in his/her own time and I'm sure once Shea decides he wants to move around he'll be all over the place.
It's an interesting perspective, momma. like you can totally see both sides of things, but it doesn't stop the protective worry from happening.
I can't throw stones. I was stressed about danny's walking. and continued to do so every month that passed that he wasn't. now I'm stressing his speech. or under-developed grunts, if you will.
I think the most important thing to keep in mind is that you're doing what you can do, and SHOULD the need arise, you will get help from all sources available. (not that I disagree with the whole 'let me decline any help and just HOPE shit works out' mentality.. just that .. oh yeah... I don't agree with that.)
anyways. I think it's perfectly fine to be concerned. in MY opinion, it's what makes you the mum you are... an involved, loving, and supportive woman who wants to provide her children with the best she can.
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